Office Flash

Well, that was interesting!

I felt hot this morning which was a complete contrast to the weather which was freezing, but I had a need to do something exciting.

When I first started doing these rather outrageous things I promised myself that I’d keep my professional side and my somewhat ‘non-vanilla’ side separate. No overlap. Nothing untoward in the office. That resolution went the same way as most new year resolutions do, but I try to have an element of deniability about what I do in the office.

So it was today. I decided to leave my blouse gaping, a strategic button undone. One that left a wholesome gap through which any interested parties could view my bra. It was tempting not to wear a bra but that would have been rather out of character and remove my ability to claim it was accidental.

I thought I knew my work colleagues. I have a team of six working for me and an immediate line manager (male) above. The magnificent seven! There are four men and two women. All very pleasant. All very straightforward. No one into smutty jokes. But my experiment this morning revealed a little more about them, or at least four of them — three men and one woman.

I tried to keep things normal. It was tempting to call any of them into the office but I didn’t want to give any impression that I was doing it deliberately.

The first in was my deputy. He’s about my age, happily married (as far as I know) and he’d never shown any sexual interest in me at all. The morning didn’t change that. I can’t believe he didn’t notice my gaping blouse but he certainly gave no indication of seeing it. We discussed the day’s projects and he went upon his way.

I truly had expected to be greeted by an embarrassed cough and an “Er, Tracy, I think you have a button loose.” But nothing. Nada.

Next up was a junior member of the team. A nice young lad. (yes he could be another John but no I tell myself, not with a work colleague!) He noticed! He was mid-sentence talking about the client he was working on when he suddenly stopped. I was looking at the report he’d drafted at the time so managed to hide my smile. Unsurprisingly he didn’t say anything but in the rest of his conversation there were lots of hesitations! I suspect his work output for the rest of the day would be minimal. I half expected him to keep coming back with queries, but he didn’t. Perhaps frequent visits to the loo sufficed.

Third up was the time server. I’m sure you know what I mean. He is in his sixties and has been with the firm since the Battle of Hastings, does just enough to not be criticised for it, and is a precise timekeeper never doing a minute more or less than his contract says he should. He is also a bachelor who spends most of his time leering at my two female members of the team and, if he gets the chance, me. One day I’ll teach him a lesson. Probably at his retirement party which is early in the new year.

He came, he saw, he drooled. Not physically. Not quite. But if I’d said ‘have a feel’, he would have been all over me. Again I managed to keep my head down. If I hadn’t I’d have had to ask what his problem was. Not to have would have been a giveaway that I knew what he was looking at. Another employee destined for the loos all afternoon!

Fourth up was my very efficient, very straight, very plain, PA. She’d been out for most of the morning so it was near lunchtime before she appeared in my office. She began telling me about her morning when she suddenly stopped. “My god Tracy, do you realise what you are showing?”

I feigned ignorance and tried to look embarrassed, (I’m not much of an actress!). “Has that pervert been in this morning? He’ll be munching on his rolos now that's for sure.”

That needs explaining and came as a shock from Tania. First, although as I’ve said the time server, Jim, I knew to be a looker I hadn’t appreciated how the other staff regarded him. Secondly, though it was her terminology — ‘munching his rolo’s — she wasn’t talking about the sweets,-it was an in-house term, started god knows where or when. But I’d not ever thought of Tania as being prepared to use it.

I’ve said she was plain. That is perhaps unkind, and looking at her carefully I realised that plainness was largely due to the way she dressed and her hairstyle. She’s in her mid-thirties, unmarried and unattached as far as I knew. I wonder…

So ended my social experiment. A huge turn-on for me and two of my staff! It taught me more about my staff, perhaps HR would give me a brownie point, and it gave me an inkling that Tania might be worth getting to know better. I know, I know, I said above that I’d not do anything with an employee but that was with a young man. This is different. Isn’t it?